I’m Single. No, like, REALLY Single! Oh, you’re Single too? Bet you’re not as Single as me!
I’m SO Single I wrote a book about it! (Truly! You can get a copy of it here!)
I’m SO Single I get invited to speak to groups about how to BE Single and how to care for Singles. (For real! You can book me here!)
I am, essentially, a professional Single.
See, I am more Single than you.
A year ago I was preparing for my first book related speaking gig. Steeling myself to step into the place of being “that Single girl” (read the blog about it here).
While dealing with a familiar wave of self-doubt and insecurity over my abilities – I was also battling a stronger wave of resistance to stepping into that emerging role. The ‘professional Single’.
I don’t want to be Single. I don’t want to be the expert on it. I don’t want to be known as that Single girl. I didn’t then. And I still don’t now.
But here we are, 12 months into the journey, and I am so incredibly humbled by all I’ve got to be a part of in that time. The fabulous people I’ve met and communities I’ve been welcomed into. The champion leaders who’ve humbled themselves to learn and understand, the many who have read the book and been shifted in their attitudes and actions. That Dad of Single adult children, the Single-again parent, the leadership team, the young adult Single, the church community – multiple unique and moving stories of how God has used the message of the book or hearing me at an event or listening to me via a radio broadcast to encourage them or strengthen their understanding, empathy and ultimately, their relationships.
It is my ongoing wrestle. So convicted of God’s call and sure in His anointing and yet so deeply desiring to be writing a different story – to be living a different kind of life.
I said this a year ago and I affirm it again today.
“So I will be “that Single girl” …and anything else He would ask me to be … trusting His timing, being confident in His calling. Even if I’d have chosen something else, I know He has chosen me for this and this for me.”
It has hurt and it has been hard – some of my loneliest moments have come on the back of these ministry opportunities – but the fruit is evident and the joy of partnering with Him in His greater work fuels me to ongoing obedience and surrender.
Even if sometimes it’s through gritted teeth and clenched hands.
I keep stepping out and moving forward.
I am a professional, after all! 🙂